To prevent crime against women, Burqas made compulsory at all ...

In a revolutionary move, the Parliament has passed a Bill which necessitates every woman/girl living on Indian soil, above the age of five to wear a burqa at all times when outside their houses. The new law now provides every Indian woman with the ?Right to Burqa?.

Initial reports suggest that the Bill was passed following the shocking results of a survey last year, which suggested that almost 120% of all women are prone to acts of molestation and sexual abuse by men and other women. The figure 120% is accounted for, since some women are prone twice as much as others.

Expectedly, there was unrest and confusion among people after the news. The Minister of Law and Justice, Salman Khurshid, who also happens to be the Minister for Minority Affairs, spoke on the matter: ?The law is crystal clear. If you are a woman, you have to wear a burqa whenever you step out of your residence. It is for your own safety, no need for so much fuss.? He also explained the reasons behind such drastic measures, ?In the past, we have been criticised for saying publicly that girls should not to wear provocative clothes. They didn?t stop, and neither did some animals, better known as men. But, what now? It?s a law now,?and you will have to abide by it, else you will end up in jails. We are going to promote this law with this catchy slogan?NO SKIN, NO SIN!?

There have been statements from well-known people that women shouldn't go out at night, and shouldn't wear provocative clothes. The nation celebrates its 66th Independence Day next month.

The decision has apparently not gone down so well with the women community, as some active members have expressed their anger and resentment over the issue. A vocal activist opined, ?While I understand that cases of abuse of women have risen exponentially over the past decade or so, and this law aims at containing the libido of perverted men, this is preposterous; they cannot do this. Uptil now, they could not manage to make it mandatory for women to wear helmets on a two-wheeler. Do they really think the entire Indian women population will just start wearing a burqa, come tomorrow?? When she was reminded that the law applied even to foreigners on Indian soil, she chuckled with derision. ?Firangees in Burqas, are you kidding me? All they know is to wear a two-piece bikini to some beach, and lay half-naked while men ogle at them!? But the law says so, and it is intended to prevent crime against women. Also, Indian men will now have no reason to stare at foreign tourists.

Another commoner, a college going boy, who looked like he had just been through a break-up, talked to us on the issue. ?It serves them right, these girls, who with their charms (skin-show?) catch innocent men like me in their web of ?love lust. Thanks to this radical move, they will no longer be able to flaunt their supposedly flawless skin to achieve their ends.?

Multiplex and discotheque owners seem to be the ones hit the hardest with the law. ?Oh my god! Who will come to discos, malls, and multiplexes dressed in a burqa? The main reason our market thrives is because women wear short, revealing dresses, thereby unknowingly (?) attracting swarms of desperate men. Which woman, in her right mind, will dance to fast, rhythmic music clad in a burqa? And, which sane man will want to dance alongside her? Tell me this is just a joke, please.?

Our reporters caught up with a man in jail, convicted for a case of sexual abuse for how he thought this innovative move could have an effect upon people with desires like his. It was only after he got tired trying to entice our female reporter into his cell, that he started talking on the issue. ?Do you really think this is going to make a difference? If anything, it will increase the cases of abuse, because of the mystery surrounding the women in burqa. Men like myself find things that we cannot have as more alluring than things we can.? He finished with a disgusting grin.

Also, the law has not gone down well with the corporate sector, which has lately been experiencing a huge influx of female employees. Vijay Mallya was visibly agitated at the news. ?So now,?my?Kingfisher air-hostesses will have to wear burqas in the planes? I am going to sue Manmohan Singh and his girlfriend (?); that is the word of an honest liquor baron, who also happens to be a Rajya Sabha MP.? He stopped talking, and moments later when he had a sudden realization, Mallya ran out of breath as he asked us, ?What about?my?Deepika and Katrina, will they have to wear burqas too??

Apparently, the news has hurt religious sentiments of some sections of the society, who insist that it is only the first time that something has hurt their religious sentiments. Amongst related reports, Rakhi Sawant has come out in the open to vociferously condemn the move, and so have Emraan Hashmi, Mahesh Bhatt, and Yuvraj Singh. Meanwhile, the Slut Walk in New Delhi has been postponed, till the time burqas are available in wholesale.

In other related news, the nation celebrates its 66th Independence Day next month.

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Source: http://newsthatmattersnot.com/2011/07/to-prevent-crime-against-women-burqas-made-compulsory-at-all-public-places.html

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